Archive for Cowboy Talk

OMG! A game of inches. Way to go “Packers”. A hard fought 34-31 victory over the Dallas Cowboys. 

Why Carry a Gun?


Why Carry a Gun?

My grandpa said to me ‘Son, there comes a time in every man’s life when he stops bustin’ knuckles and starts bustin’ caps and usually it’s when he becomes too old to take an ass whoopin.’

I don’t carry a gun to kill people.
I carry a gun to keep from being killed.

I  don’t carry a gun to scare people.
I carry a gun because sometimes this world can be a scary place.

I  don’t carry a gun because I’m paranoid
I carry a gun because there are real threats in the world.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m evil.
I carry a gun  because I have lived long enough to see the evil in the world.

I don’t carry a gun because I hate the government.
I carry a gun because I understand the limitations of government.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m angry.
I carry a gun so that I don’t have to spend the rest of my life hating myself for failing to be prepared.

I don’t carry a gun because I want to shoot someone.
I carry a gun because I want to die at a ripe old age in my bed, and not on a sidewalk somewhere tomorrow afternoon.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m a cowboy.
I carry a gun because, when I die and go to heaven, I want to be a  cowboy.

I don’t carry a gun to make me feel like a man.
I carry a gun because men know how to take care of themselves and the ones they love.

I don’t carry a gun because I feel inadequate.
I carry a gun because, unarmed and facing three armed thugs, I am inadequate.

I don’t carry a gun because I love it.
I carry a gun because I love life and the people who make it meaningful to me.

Police protection is an oxymoron.
Free citizens must protect themselves.
Police do not protect you from crime, they usually investigate the crime after it happens and then call someone in to clean up the mess.

Personally, I carry a gun because I’m too young to die and too old to take an ass whoopin’……author unknown (but obviously brilliant)


In 1929, the Soviet Union established gun control. From 1929 to 1953, about 20 million dissidents, unable to defend themselves, were rounded up and exterminated.

In 1911, Turkey established gun control. From 1915 to 1917, 1.5 million Armenians, unable to defend themselves, were rounded up and exterminated.

Germany  established gun control in 1938 and from 1939 to 1945, a total of 13 million Jews and others who were unable to defend themselves were rounded up and exterminated.

China  established gun control in 1935; From 1948 to 1952, 20 million political dissidents, unable to defend themselves, were rounded up and exterminated.

Guatemala established gun control in 1964. From 1964 to 1981, 100,000 Mayan Indians, unable to defend themselves, were rounded up and exterminated.

Uganda established gun control in 1970. From 1971 to 1979, 300,000 Christians, unable to defend themselves, were rounded up and exterminated.

Cambodia established gun control in 1956. From 1975 to 1977, one million educated people, unable to defend themselves, were rounded up and exterminated.

Defenseless people rounded up and exterminated in the 20th Century because of gun control: 56 million.

You won’t see this data on the US evening news, or hear politicians disseminating this information.

Guns in the hands of honest citizens save lives and property and, yes, gun-control laws adversely affect only the law-abiding citizens.

Take note my fellow Americans, before it’s too late!

The next time someone talks in favor of gun control, please remind them of this history lesson.

With guns, we are ‘citizens’.  Without them, we are ‘subjects’

During WWII the Japanese decided not to invade America because they knew most Americans were ARMED!

If you value your freedom, please spread this anti-gun-control message to all of your friends.

The purpose of fighting is to win.
There is no possible victory in defense.
The sword is more important than the shield, and skill is more important than either.
The final weapon is the brain.
All else is supplemental.





Cowboy Rules!

1.  Pull your pants up.  You look like an idiot.

2.  Turn your cap right, your head ain’t crooked.

3.  Let’s get this straight: it’s called a ‘gravel road.’ I drive a pickup truck because I want to.  No matter how slow you drive, you’re gonna get dust on your Lexus.  Drive it or get out of the way.

4.  They are cattle.  That’s why they smell like cattle.  They smell like money to us.  Get over it.  Don’t like it?  I-10, I-40, I-70 and I-80 go east and west, I-17, I-15, I-25 and I-35 goes north and south.  Pick one and go.

5.  So you have a $60,000 car.  We’re impressed.  We have $250,000 Combines that are driven only 3 weeks a year.

6.  Every person in the Wild West waves.  It’s called being friendly.  Try to understand the concept.

7.  If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese/pheasants/ducks/doves are comin’ in during the hunts, we WILL shoot it outa your hand.  You better hope you don’t have it up to your ear at the time.

8.  Yeah.  We eat trout, salmon, deer, elk, bear and moose.  You really want sushi and caviar?  It’s available at the corner bait shop.

9.  The ‘Opener’ refers to the first day of hunting season.  It’s a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.

10.  We open doors for women.  That’s applied to all women, regardless of age.

11.  No, there’s no ‘vegetarian special’ on the menu.  Order steak, or you can order the Chef’s Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey.

12.  When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads.  We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup!  Oh, yeah .  .  We don’t care what you folks in Cincinnati call that stuff you eat –  IT AIN’T REAL CHILI!!

13.  You bring ‘Coke’ into my house, it better be brown, wet and served over ice.  You bring ‘Mary Jane’ into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

14.  College and High School Football is as important here as the Giants, the Yankees, the Mets, the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.

15.  Yeah, we have golf courses.  But don’t hit the water hazards – it spooks the fish

16.  Turn down that blasted car stereo!  That thumpity-thump crap ain’t music, anyway.  We don’t want to hear it anymore than we want to see your boxers!  Refer back to #1!

Favorite sayin’s

Howdy Ya’ll

Don’t squat on your Spurs.

Go West young Man, Go West.

A Cowboy is a man with guts and a horse.

I’m gonna pump ya’ full of lead.

Never drink unless your alone or with somebody.

Cowboy coffee aint’ safe drinkin’.

There’s many theories about arguin’ with a woman. None of them work.

Being silent, may be your best answer.

Every trail has puddles, son.

No matter where you go. There you are.

Sometimes we have summer all winter and winter all summer, but regulararly’ we have no rain.

Don’t just lay there and bleed.

Scars are Cowboy tattoos with better stories.

Howdy Pard!

Only out on the Range can you find yourself.

Whoa Nellie!

Back off city boy.

I reckon this is gonna hurt a little.

Size does matter, the bigger your buckle the better.

Give me a stiff one, Barkeep.

Ride it like you stole it.

Come to wake some snakes?

That horse could buck a mans whiskers plum off.

Don’t ever try on another mans Hat, it’s like getting’ on his Horse or Woman.

Don’t worry ‘bout bitin’ off more than you can chew, your mouth is bigger’n you think.

Never drink downstream from your horse.

Cowboys never have enough guns, dogs, or pickup trucks.

That boy’s plumb weak north of his ears!

Telling a man to go to hell and makin’ him do it are two different propositions.

Well Butter my Butt and call me Biscut!

He’ll be all over that like a chicken on a June bug!

That beats anything I ever helt, felt or smelt.